| 'Don't hurry. Don't worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along
| the way.' *~Walter Hagen*
! *Editor's Note*: This Is A Guest Post By Victoria Vargas Of
Smaller Living [1]. !
We all know that we need to stop and smell the roses and enjoy the
small joys in our lives. However, we have to have room in our minds
and schedules to engage not just in those joyful moments, but also in
reflection afterward.
It's in the processing and reflection [2] that allows these
experiences to become meaningful to us and for us to deeply experience
the joys they hold. Downsizing and living smaller helps us do that.
Does that sound counter intuitive? If so, I'm not surprised.
There's a skewed perception in the media today that downsizing is a
painful necessity of those in hard financial straits and that smaller
living and minimalism are about austerity and deprivation, not joy.
That couldn't be further from the truth. In my experience, the
process of downsizing has given me a surprising sense of relief, not
just in the results I've achieved, but also in the daily engagement
with the process. It gives me a sense of freedom that grows with each
passing day and a greater capacity to experience the small joys of
everyday life.
!! Learning The Power Of Simple Joys !!
I was hiking along a trail in the Silver Falls State Park in Oregon
with my soon to be boyfriend and as we rounded a curve, a breathtaking
vista complete with a roaring waterfall came into view. Both of us
stopped in our tracks and breathed deeply at the same time,
blissed-out smiles creeping up our cheeks. What I remember most was
the complete happiness of that moment as we stood together, our eyes
alight with the raw beauty of where we were and the companionship of
sharing it with each other.
That moment on the trail is one I'm not likely to forget. Just
recounting it here fills me with joy. With my previous approach to
traveling and living, I likely would have rushed from "hey, cool
waterfall" to "what's next?" Not anymore.
!! Acknowledging Joy !!
Joy comes from the realization of how special the moment we're
experiencing is, such as sharing the sight of an amazing waterfall
with someone dear to us, a spontaneous hug from a child, our pet's
enthusiasm at our return home, the burble of the coffee maker in the
morning, curling up with a new book by our favorite author, or the
sound of our name when spoken with love by our inamorato. None of
these small joys would be nearly as significant to me had I continued
to live my in the frantic, chaotic, and over-scheduled way I did
before committing to living a smaller and saner life. Yes, of course,
I knew they were special moments, but I didn't often give myself the
time to savor them when they occurred or process and reflect on them
afterward. Thus, I lost much of the joy such experiences can bring.
!! Depth And Joy !!
| "The moments we enjoy most as they unfold, and that we treasure
| long afterward, are the ones we experience most deeply. Depth
| roots us in the world, gives life substance and wholeness. It
| enriches our work, our relationships, everything we do. It's the
| essential ingredient of a good life and one of the qualities we
| admire most in others." William Powers.
Cultivating small joys was one of my major motivations for living
smaller. When we intentionally downscale our lives and possessions, it
is because we're seeking something more in our lives, something more
meaningful, fulfilling, free, and joyful. By jettisoning the
meaningless clutter and bustle from our lives, we free up the time and
space for small joys to arise and for us to fully appreciate them for
the richness and texture they bring our lives.
Understanding what is important in our lives allows us to rid
ourselves of the rest without remorse. As Cal Newport recently wrote
in a guest post here on Zen Habits [3], " … when you know what
your life is about it's easy to sidestep all that threatens to
clutter it." Time, attention, and most especially, the ability to
go deep into our experiences—all gifts of minimalist and smaller
living—are the critical ingredients for a life to be rich with
simple joys.
So how can you create and enjoy more small joys in your life?
*1. Allow some breathing room in your schedule*. When we rush, we
barely acknowledge what is happening around us. I can't remember
ever hearing someone say they had a joy-filled day because they were
rushed and stressed, running from one thing to the next.
*2. Be present*. Being present, a common theme here on Zen Habits [4],
is absolutely essential for experiencing and appreciating the small
joys of life. Instead of always thinking of the next thing on our
to-do list or itinerary, being present allows us to recognize and
enjoy those small moments of joy as they arise.
*3.* *Stay with the moment and fully experience it*. Pay attention to
the details.
*4. Remember this*. Remind yourself at the time of how it makes you
feel and what about it you want to treasure. Think of these moments
like little GPS way stations, points in time and space that you want
to commit to memory.
*5. Go deep*. Great joy can be experienced from even the smallest,
seemingly inconsequential thing by going deeper into the experience
and not just flitting along the surface of it. Go deep with it, relish
it, and store that moment away in your memory banks. These small joys
are the moments that make up a meaningful life.
*6. Make a note of it*. Journal about it or consider keeping a Joy
List and jot down these small joys as they happen in your life. When
the world starts coming on too strong, taking a few moments to refresh
your memory of the small joys in your life can bring a calmness,
centering, and contentment back to your day.
*7. Cultivate moments of joy by doing the things you love*. Nothing
picks me up and makes me more joyful than tooling around town on my
bicycle with a cool breeze in my hair and the sun on my shoulders.
Something about it makes me feel free, childlike, and gleeful (ringing
the little bell mounted on my handlebars is a happy bonus). Take the
time to understand what speaks to your soul and make joy dates with
yourself to keep that feeling in your life.
*8. If you're traveling, send the joy home on a postcard to
yourself*. At the start of your trip, pick up a handful of postcards
and stamps and keep one or two with you at all times. When something
you want to remember, some small joy, occurs, you can jot it down and
pop it in the mail to yourself to be waiting for you when you return.
I picked up this habit some years ago from a travel memoir by Alice
Steinbeck called Without Reservations. One of my favorites I sent
myself reads:
| " Dear Vic, Remember the deer that stopped not two feet from you
| this morning while you were having coffee on the yoga deck? She
| looked you right in the eye and then bent down to nibble on the
| plants without concern. Don't forget the magic of that moment:
| the soft shine in her eyes as she gazed into yours and found you
| to be good company."
It's easy in the days and weeks that follow the whirlwind of travel
to start losing those magical details of your experiences. Keeping a
journal works well for some people, but many find it hard to maintain
when on the go. Sending a postcard to yourself with just a few lines
scribbled on it lets you capture the moment with minimal fuss and
relive the joy again once you return home.
*9. Share small joys with loved ones that live far away*. One of my
favorite daily rituals is my evening Skype video call with my
boyfriend. It's often the shared smaller joys and pleasures that
stay in my memory afterward and that bring us closer. Likewise,
although we live more than 2,000 miles apart, my mother and I often
call each other to share some little joy we experienced— like a
recent call from her to tell me about the sweet nest of baby birds she
discovered in a flowerpot on her porch. Reach out and share the little
joys of your life with your loved ones that live distant and you'll
find your relationship with them stays more nourished, loving, and
positive.
*10. Gift small joys to those you love*. If you know some small thing
brings a loved one joy, find ways to gift it to them. Does the sight
of a cheerful jelly jar with daisies make your lover smile
contentedly? Then have it waiting for them at their place at the table
when they sit down this Monday morning. Does an early evening walk
make a child in your life prance with happiness? Then do it. Take the
time and give them your full attention on that walk, stopping to stare
at the cool but creepy grasshopper or skip rocks across the water.
Intentionally giving small moments of joy to members of our tribe is
an amazing testament of our love for them and brings us more joy in
return.
Small joys are available to us in the pauses between the outer actions
that fill our lives. They are the depth in the moments lived fully
with complete attention. This is what smaller living is all about,
cultivating simple joys in our days while stepping outside of the
schedules, deadlines, and chaos that make up so much of modern life.
Joy comes when we take the time to thoroughly relish something
wonderful we're experiencing, no matter how small or insignificant
it may seem to others. For me, simple joys seem to be the most durable
and memorable.
Ask yourself, what's one small thing you can do today to bring joy
to you or someone you love?
Got it? Lovely.
Now go do it.
*Victoria writes at Smaller Living [5] about right-sizing our
lifestyles for the space and freedom to live large. Read more by
subscribing to her feed [6]*.
---
*If you liked this guide, please bookmark it on Delicious [7] or share
on Twitter. Thanks, my friends.*
Links:
------
[1] http://www.smallerliving.net/vicblogs/
[2] http://zenhabits.net/5-powerful-reasons-to-make-reflection-a-daily-habit-and-how-to-do-it/
[3] http://zenhabits.net/cultivating-passion/
[4] http://zenhabits.net/the-10-essential-rules-for-slowing-down-and-enjoying-life-more/
[5] http://www.smallerliving.net/vicblogs/
[6] http://feeds.feedburner.com/smallerliving
[7] http://del.icio.us/post?url=http://zenhabits.net/smaller-living/&title=The Simple Joys of Smaller Living
0 comments:
Post a Comment